tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5022318990784415929.post6528888163119911102..comments2023-10-20T11:17:47.246-04:00Comments on Two Nerdy History Girls: Weddings in Old AlbaniaUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5022318990784415929.post-37561773703586609072011-04-08T17:39:55.944-04:002011-04-08T17:39:55.944-04:00I think I might have packed some of that wolfsbane...I think I might have packed some of that wolfsbane in with my trousseau, just in case.Jane Onoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5022318990784415929.post-52662251400149352082011-04-08T16:42:24.773-04:002011-04-08T16:42:24.773-04:00Very interesting post.
Can you imagine what that ...Very interesting post. <br />Can you imagine what that must have been like? What if the man was cruel? I think I'd have to take the path of the sworn virgin. I'd rather fend for myself than live under the thumb of such a man.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17502732385807861317noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5022318990784415929.post-89757478049154628682011-04-08T15:54:34.750-04:002011-04-08T15:54:34.750-04:00Chris, that NY Times piece describes the situation...Chris, that NY Times piece describes the situation as well as the virgins very well. Thank you for posting the link, because it’s well worth reading for insight into the culture. (BTW, Alice Munro wrote a short story, The Albanian Virgin, that appeared in the New Yorker.) The key to understanding this phenomenon is realizing it was an extremely patriarchal society. <br />Anonymous, I'd like to believe that parents took into account their children's feelings. That sounds reasonable, given 21st century sensibilities. But in arranging the marriages, the parents were doing what they believed was good for their children—as in the case in other cultures where marriages are arranged. I know the kids were married quite young. My paternal grandmother was married at age 14 to a man at least twice her age. What father (the mother had no say) would believe his teenage daughter knew better than he did what was good for her? And this was a culture in which women were not important. “The Kanun considers the woman as a superfluity in the household.” “A woman is a sack, made to endure.” I think _most_ women (always, everywhere there are exceptions—like my maternal grandmother) accepted this way of thinking: It either didn’t occur to them that things should be different or the consequences of rebelling were too frightful. The good news is, things have turned around quite a bit in Albania in the last half-century, as the NYT piece says, and women have considerable power . . . except for some of those little isolated pockets.LorettaChasehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03641586650738945106noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5022318990784415929.post-54922504551465761462011-04-08T09:11:48.042-04:002011-04-08T09:11:48.042-04:00Makes you wonder how many women became widows afte...Makes you wonder how many women became widows after unwanted hubby had a bit of wolfsbane for dinner.<br /><br />On the other hand, while the law is one thing, there have probably always been plenty of parents who want their children to be happy as well as well married.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5022318990784415929.post-16792154902956471402011-04-08T07:57:20.388-04:002011-04-08T07:57:20.388-04:00Then (as I'm sure you know, Loretta) you have ...Then (as I'm sure you know, Loretta) you have the burrnesha, the "sworn virgins" who cut their hair, dress in men's clothing, and take an oath of virginity, thus becoming a man in a legal and societal sense. This is a way to get out of an arranged marriage without dishonoring the groom and his family and without creating a blood feud. Sworn virgins could take traditional men's jobs, freely associate with men, smoke, own property, and have all the freedoms of a man. They did not, however marry.<br /><br />http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/23/world/europe/23iht-virgins.4.13927949.htmlChris Woodyardnoreply@blogger.com